2005 Auburn International Triathlon
After riding the bike course with Steve, Kelly and Amy, I arrogantly thought, "how tough can the run be?" Oh, but it can be tough. Having gone into it without much training, I almost mooed like a cow being scorched by a hot iron.
Nicole Deboom was doing a soliloquy when I arrived at the pasta dinner. I quickly spotted the Mad Cows table and started grazing. This was going to be a fun night!
So even though my Ironman Edition Civic pales in comparison with Steve's camper, I was still looking forward to pretending like I was sleeping in a business-class cabin. That is, until Mary gave me two tempting offers: 1. share a tent with her and Jennifer, or 2. sleep in her mini-planet sized SUV. After 16 minutes of Good v.s. Evil self struggle, I flicked the evil Sinclair off of my left shoulder and opted for the SUV. But to show my appreciation, I performed a quick strip-tease for them before headed off to the start the next morning. That's the least I could've done.
Race morning, I spotted the UCD tri volunteers and started chuckling when I saw Matt Roper, the Super- human Swimmer. "Hey Matt!! Have you heard the good news? Brad replaced the swim with a 3K Run!!". Hahaha, I should be a comedian.
So the cannon went off! Mike M. and I were running side by side, followed by Marianne, Curtis and the rest of the herd. That 3K went by fast! Cary was cheering for us at T1 while waiting for her runner.
I thought I lead the herd until 10 miles into the bike when I saw Steve N. WTF? Dr. N quickly diagnosed the situation and determined that Mike passed me in the T1. No matter. I was now the bellwether.
At mile 23, I noticed a quiet shadow behind me. It was none other than the first lady. After she's been spotted, Kelly gave me a quick grin, and sprinted forward. Hey, what is this roadie psychological crap? This is a triathlon, damn it! Then Diana blew past me not too soon after that.
I was so demoralized that I decided to pee on the bike. I could hear Jan's voice, "Remember to not pee into the wind young Skywalker. Don't get stage- fright." Jan (whom I passionately call "The Docta") always has a wise advise when I needed it.
I was excited to finally get to the run. "Ha, just 1.5 hours away from the finish!" How foolish I was. 3 miles into it, I was greeted by Steve Casewell returning for the turn-around. He was looking happy. I guess I'd be happy, too, if I've got a fit, scantly clad female PRO running right in front of me.
Mike Pughes passed me a few miles later. Why do people always say "good job" when they pass you? I was worried about Amy because it was her first Half IM, and a tough one. Then I saw her running toward me, smiling, yelling and giving me a high-five. What a great person to be in a race with!
The rest of the run became a fun cultural experience for me. I gave each of the little hills a cute French nickname, like "La Merde", "La Salope", and "La Putain" to name a few.
Tearing things up at a race with the herd is always fun. Let's do it again next year!